Still learning to think positively

I was thinking a bit more about the 7th point of the previous post while cutting a couple of shomenuchis in our room: "Do something that makes you feel better". If this is part of a pattern that is associated with negative thinking and with - wrongly - focusing on what we don't want then there should be at least two types of activities that make us feel better. One is when I do something that makes me feel better and it is negative, destructive and doesn't lead to a better life, only to better moments. The other is when doing that something makes me feel better and it is actually positive, constructive and possibly makes my life better. Now, there are two questions I'm thinking about:

1. How can I distinguish between these two activity types?
2. In point 7, does the activity itself make me feel better or the outcome of it?

I'm not sure about the answers to these questions.

For example, I like playing with music trackers and creating music. I enjoy the process and I can go very deeply within myself to get to a point when composing is just an automatic process and the rest of the world is almost completely excluded. Now, this process makes me feel better, makes me comfortable when doing it. It doesn't produce anything useful in general because I compose for the sake of playing with music and noone else listens to the music but me (I don't really give it away to anyone because I don't want to be criticised in this but that's a different thing). Also, when I finish sometimes I need more than a day to properly return to the real world as I often end up in a depressed-like state when finishing composing. It's obviously something that fits into the desctiption of point seven. Or is it not?

I could say the same about any of my hobbies including aikido trainings. I look forward to training, I go to trainings, I switch off the real world during trainings, and when the training finishes I either end up tired, happy and sleepy, or tired, frustrated and sleepy. So whether it's good or not, I end up sleepy and want to have more of it soon. Does this fit into point seven? It looks like so. Would you describe trainings as something that are there to disctract and comfort you? Certainly not.

 With this, another question comes up: what is a good training like? For me a good training is when I learn something and finish with a generally good feeling, that a tiny bit of my technique has improved or I have understood something. My sensei says a good training is not like this. According to him, a good training is when a student doesn't feel good at the end but they feel how much is missing because leaving a training with the feeling "I'm the king/queen of the dojo" is not good. I don't agree with this. If I train hard enough I will make sure to remember all my mistakes I manage to identify until these mistakes are somehow corrected. I want to enjoy my trainings and I want to walk home with a good and positive feeling. So is it good when it's good or is it good when it's bad? Should I want to enjoy a training or should I want to leave with the identification of my 50 worst errors? Kant says (I think it was him) that whatever you do, when you enjoy it it doesn't have any moral value. Many phylosophers disagree with him, so what is good then?

Maybe I don't understand the idea of wanting and not wanting something. What can I want? I want to do aikido. Will that support me and pay my bills the next month? I doubt it. So maybe I have to want something else and while getting there, I can keep aikido as sleeping pills, something that comforts me.

Or maybe I should just stop thinking about this and go and find a good job. But oops, that's a 'have to' and not a 'want'! Help!